I know, I know, I should update this blog before getting a new one. But I find it easier to update my other one since I don't have to take forever uploading pics. No worries, for those that do like pics I am still working on a picture update for you. There's just a lot.
Anyway...I started a new blog called The Chocolates in the Box. You can read the description on it when you visit..if you do. I am excited for it and I think it's going to be fun!
Well, I love you all and sure do miss seeing all the fun stuff that happens! I need to blog more often on here. That will be an early New Year's resolution.
Here's the address--www.thechocolatesinthebox.blogspot.com
I hope it's fun to someone!
Thanks!
Friday, October 14, 2011
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Life...
So, just a note of CAUTION: THIS POST MAY BE EXTREMELY LONG! SO IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ IT ALL, I WILL ABSOLUTELY NOT BE OFFENDED!!!
I haven't blogged in a while and I feel like I am going to take a different approach this time. Every time I have blogged in the past it has always been to show how things are going in life. I share all the good things in life and only share things that I can show through pictures. I feel like the people who do actually read this may know me pretty well, but lately I feel like I have made a lot of changes in my life and I don't even know myself.
I don't mean to sound dramatic but I want to have somewhere I can just write down my thoughts. I want to have a place where not only I can get to know myself, but a place where I can share the FEELINGS I have. Things you can't capture in a picture. At least, not the complete effect.
Lately there have been some things I have changed in my life. The last 8 months have been really interesting for me and I know that it's for the better. Sometimes though, I'm not sure as to how SOME things are for the better and I struggle. I'm here to give myself reassurance. I feel like I am usually a pretty happy and positive person. I mean, everyone has their days when you just want to break glass, haha, not always that violent but you know what I mean. Those days when you just don't want to talk or see anyone and not do anything. Then there are those days when you don't know why you feel sad, when there's absolutely no reason to be sad, or those days when you just feel like you are in a weird funk but you just don't know what's going on.
I've had some of those days lately, not very frequently, enough that I know there might be a problem, but I wish I could pinpoint exactly what my problem is. I don't like feeling sad. I don't like when people ask me how I'm doing and I just want to say, "I feel horrible and I can't stand being here", or "I'm upset and don't want to do absolutely anything or talk to anyone today." I hate being the person that is always complaining about one thing or another. I hate burdening people with my problems. I feel like, there are so many other people who have worse problems than mine and don't complain. It's all they know. And here I am in a country of so many freedoms and opportunies and I am feeling ungrateful, like I don't have enough.
So, what I've decided to do is make a list of the things that make me feel happy that I am very grateful to have. Things that aren't material. Freedoms that I have. Opportunities that have been given to me. Things I've done that have made me grow as a person. Although things may go not go the way I want them to go, I truly am grateful for so many things and I don't express it enough.
1. My family.
I don't know what I would do without my family. There have been hard times but we've made it and I am so grateful for that. Not everyone has a mother AND a father who are willing to do anything for them. My parents obviously have their flaws, as do I, and I love that. They may not be fun to deal with it, but these flaws are what have made us who we are today. Whether people like how we deal with our flaws or not, I feel like we are strong people, individually and as a family, and I absolutely wouldn't change them for any other family in this world. I love them so much and I wish that I could tell them this without them thinking I was silly, but I really do love them SO SO much, and would feel imcomplete without them.
2. Heavenly Father.
He is my savior. He made the ultimate sacrifice anyone could make for us. He loves me. He knows of my trials and tribulations. He will never test me with anything that I can't handle. I know that He has a plan for all of us and that He will never abandon me, as long as I am following the commandments that have been given to me. There's a poem called "Footprints" by Margaret Fishback Powers. You should all read it. It makes me want to cry everytime I read it. Sometimes I still do. Sometimes I think about how my life would be if I didn't believe in God. I feel like if it was all I knew I might be ok, but I know now that just having the belief and faith in Him in your life makes things so much easier. Even to understand why bad things happen to people. I have so much faith and I know that people change. Sometimes for worse and sometimes for better. They really do. I am so glad that I have Him with me and am so grateful that I believe in Him.
3. Life.
What can I say. I haven't had too many trials compared to other people. I really can say that I do have a great life. I don't mean to be boastful, but think about it. I have not only the things mentioned above, but I do have a home, food, and clothes to wear and water to drink. I have what millions of people don't have. Also, I have the opportunity to be tested and go through experiences that can help me grow and become a better person. Sometimes I feel like we take life for granted. Really, the purpose of life, regardless of whether you believe in God or not, should be to be happy. If you aren't doing things that make you happy, life can really suck. You feel like nothing will ever get better, like you don't deserve the things you have and that you aren't getting the things that you "need" or want. I am so grateful to have the opportunity to grow and to help other people and change. I love being able to live. Breathe. Have a beating heart. I love living and am grateful for every moment I have.
4. Friends.
I am so grateful to have friends. I am grateful that they love me. I love that we can just hang out doing nothing and it is fun. I love that the people and friends I have in my life now don't pressure me into doing things I don't want to. I mean, yeah I know no one can ever "make" you do anything, but many of us have been in situations that haven't been the prettiest because of the pressure given by people. I love that we have similar interests and even though I am weird, you all accept me for who I am. Without reservations. You will be there no matter what, even if I call you at 3 in the morning bawling or freaking out about something. I love you all and am ever so grateful to have met you all. I seriously do believe that people are placed in your life for a reason. There has absolutely been a reason for me to meet each of you and I appreciate those of you that have stuck around to be in my life today! :)
5. Trials and Tribulations.
I know, many of you might be thinking. Wow, who in the freak likes to have trials and tribulations?!? You might say, "Have mine, take them all!"
But seriously, take a minute to really think about this one. You are the person you are today because of all the experiences you have been through. Good AND bad. The good experiences help you acknowledge the positive aspects in your life. The bad experiences help you APPRECIATE what you do have in life and give you a different perspective of what y ou really want in life. There have been times in my life where I have cried myself to sleep for over a month straight. Again, not to be dramatic but some of us have times like that. I have felt like I had no purpose in life. I wanted to just disappear to an island and never come back. But in the end, it doesn't matter what problem you might have, everything happens for a reason. It might be completely devastating to you, but there is purpose in everything that happens. I personally believe that trials we go through are given to us because we can handle them. I obviously am taking a religious view on it that most religions agree with. We are here to learn and grow and it isn't always going to be easy. I love that I am the person I am today because of the hard times. I hope I don't jinx myself by saying I love problems, because I don't. But I appreciate them after the fact. I take each experience as a learning opportunity and I want to be able to learn everything I can now, so that when I have children I can help them with as much as I can. I don't want to experience every bad thing there is obviously, but I want to have a broad perspective on life and not be judgemental. I know everyone is judgemental at some point or another, because that is how life is. It's inevitable. It's just a matter of TRYING to be better at not judging people, and accepting people for who they are, because I want to be accepted for who I am.
But really, I think we all need to learn to accept the trials we have in life and go with it. It is way easier said than done, I know. But it will make us all such stronger people in the end. And there IS a reason for what is happening. Just always keep in mind that we are here to be happy. People always say, "One door closes so a better one can open", and it is very true. So just think about that, it might take a while to get what you want or need, but SOMETHING BETTER, WILL come. Whether you believe it or not, it WILL. I promise you, I have seen it in my life and in other people's lives and I guarantee to you, that regardless of what your situation is, even death, something better is there.
I love you all and if you made it to this point you truly are a trooper! I am grateful to have you all, whether you read this or not :) I really hope I didn't bore you all but that's my take on life right now. I hope I didn't offend anyone and I hope you all understand that I really am happy right now. I just am in a funk today and wanted to get out some feelings I was having.
The next post will be way happier. I pinky promise. :)
Thank you all!
I haven't blogged in a while and I feel like I am going to take a different approach this time. Every time I have blogged in the past it has always been to show how things are going in life. I share all the good things in life and only share things that I can show through pictures. I feel like the people who do actually read this may know me pretty well, but lately I feel like I have made a lot of changes in my life and I don't even know myself.
I don't mean to sound dramatic but I want to have somewhere I can just write down my thoughts. I want to have a place where not only I can get to know myself, but a place where I can share the FEELINGS I have. Things you can't capture in a picture. At least, not the complete effect.
Lately there have been some things I have changed in my life. The last 8 months have been really interesting for me and I know that it's for the better. Sometimes though, I'm not sure as to how SOME things are for the better and I struggle. I'm here to give myself reassurance. I feel like I am usually a pretty happy and positive person. I mean, everyone has their days when you just want to break glass, haha, not always that violent but you know what I mean. Those days when you just don't want to talk or see anyone and not do anything. Then there are those days when you don't know why you feel sad, when there's absolutely no reason to be sad, or those days when you just feel like you are in a weird funk but you just don't know what's going on.
I've had some of those days lately, not very frequently, enough that I know there might be a problem, but I wish I could pinpoint exactly what my problem is. I don't like feeling sad. I don't like when people ask me how I'm doing and I just want to say, "I feel horrible and I can't stand being here", or "I'm upset and don't want to do absolutely anything or talk to anyone today." I hate being the person that is always complaining about one thing or another. I hate burdening people with my problems. I feel like, there are so many other people who have worse problems than mine and don't complain. It's all they know. And here I am in a country of so many freedoms and opportunies and I am feeling ungrateful, like I don't have enough.
So, what I've decided to do is make a list of the things that make me feel happy that I am very grateful to have. Things that aren't material. Freedoms that I have. Opportunities that have been given to me. Things I've done that have made me grow as a person. Although things may go not go the way I want them to go, I truly am grateful for so many things and I don't express it enough.
1. My family.
I don't know what I would do without my family. There have been hard times but we've made it and I am so grateful for that. Not everyone has a mother AND a father who are willing to do anything for them. My parents obviously have their flaws, as do I, and I love that. They may not be fun to deal with it, but these flaws are what have made us who we are today. Whether people like how we deal with our flaws or not, I feel like we are strong people, individually and as a family, and I absolutely wouldn't change them for any other family in this world. I love them so much and I wish that I could tell them this without them thinking I was silly, but I really do love them SO SO much, and would feel imcomplete without them.
2. Heavenly Father.
He is my savior. He made the ultimate sacrifice anyone could make for us. He loves me. He knows of my trials and tribulations. He will never test me with anything that I can't handle. I know that He has a plan for all of us and that He will never abandon me, as long as I am following the commandments that have been given to me. There's a poem called "Footprints" by Margaret Fishback Powers. You should all read it. It makes me want to cry everytime I read it. Sometimes I still do. Sometimes I think about how my life would be if I didn't believe in God. I feel like if it was all I knew I might be ok, but I know now that just having the belief and faith in Him in your life makes things so much easier. Even to understand why bad things happen to people. I have so much faith and I know that people change. Sometimes for worse and sometimes for better. They really do. I am so glad that I have Him with me and am so grateful that I believe in Him.
3. Life.
What can I say. I haven't had too many trials compared to other people. I really can say that I do have a great life. I don't mean to be boastful, but think about it. I have not only the things mentioned above, but I do have a home, food, and clothes to wear and water to drink. I have what millions of people don't have. Also, I have the opportunity to be tested and go through experiences that can help me grow and become a better person. Sometimes I feel like we take life for granted. Really, the purpose of life, regardless of whether you believe in God or not, should be to be happy. If you aren't doing things that make you happy, life can really suck. You feel like nothing will ever get better, like you don't deserve the things you have and that you aren't getting the things that you "need" or want. I am so grateful to have the opportunity to grow and to help other people and change. I love being able to live. Breathe. Have a beating heart. I love living and am grateful for every moment I have.
4. Friends.
I am so grateful to have friends. I am grateful that they love me. I love that we can just hang out doing nothing and it is fun. I love that the people and friends I have in my life now don't pressure me into doing things I don't want to. I mean, yeah I know no one can ever "make" you do anything, but many of us have been in situations that haven't been the prettiest because of the pressure given by people. I love that we have similar interests and even though I am weird, you all accept me for who I am. Without reservations. You will be there no matter what, even if I call you at 3 in the morning bawling or freaking out about something. I love you all and am ever so grateful to have met you all. I seriously do believe that people are placed in your life for a reason. There has absolutely been a reason for me to meet each of you and I appreciate those of you that have stuck around to be in my life today! :)
5. Trials and Tribulations.
I know, many of you might be thinking. Wow, who in the freak likes to have trials and tribulations?!? You might say, "Have mine, take them all!"
But seriously, take a minute to really think about this one. You are the person you are today because of all the experiences you have been through. Good AND bad. The good experiences help you acknowledge the positive aspects in your life. The bad experiences help you APPRECIATE what you do have in life and give you a different perspective of what y ou really want in life. There have been times in my life where I have cried myself to sleep for over a month straight. Again, not to be dramatic but some of us have times like that. I have felt like I had no purpose in life. I wanted to just disappear to an island and never come back. But in the end, it doesn't matter what problem you might have, everything happens for a reason. It might be completely devastating to you, but there is purpose in everything that happens. I personally believe that trials we go through are given to us because we can handle them. I obviously am taking a religious view on it that most religions agree with. We are here to learn and grow and it isn't always going to be easy. I love that I am the person I am today because of the hard times. I hope I don't jinx myself by saying I love problems, because I don't. But I appreciate them after the fact. I take each experience as a learning opportunity and I want to be able to learn everything I can now, so that when I have children I can help them with as much as I can. I don't want to experience every bad thing there is obviously, but I want to have a broad perspective on life and not be judgemental. I know everyone is judgemental at some point or another, because that is how life is. It's inevitable. It's just a matter of TRYING to be better at not judging people, and accepting people for who they are, because I want to be accepted for who I am.
But really, I think we all need to learn to accept the trials we have in life and go with it. It is way easier said than done, I know. But it will make us all such stronger people in the end. And there IS a reason for what is happening. Just always keep in mind that we are here to be happy. People always say, "One door closes so a better one can open", and it is very true. So just think about that, it might take a while to get what you want or need, but SOMETHING BETTER, WILL come. Whether you believe it or not, it WILL. I promise you, I have seen it in my life and in other people's lives and I guarantee to you, that regardless of what your situation is, even death, something better is there.
I love you all and if you made it to this point you truly are a trooper! I am grateful to have you all, whether you read this or not :) I really hope I didn't bore you all but that's my take on life right now. I hope I didn't offend anyone and I hope you all understand that I really am happy right now. I just am in a funk today and wanted to get out some feelings I was having.
The next post will be way happier. I pinky promise. :)
Thank you all!
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
My Year...
Holy cow!!! So first I'm going to apologize for this SUPER LONG post. But to the request of my fantabulous friend Jessica :) I have finally finished this post. Ok, so for the update of how my year has gone since...oh last August here goes! The pictures go from newest up top to oldest down bottom...and they are out of order too so I am really sorry for the disorganization..but at least you can see them, right? Anyway, so, for this year I have learned quite a bit! I've learned a ton about myself and I have had so much fun with my new friends! Ok, so I'm not sure what all you guys have seen or read on my blog, but last year after I went to Disneyland it was pretty much just amazingness ever since!!
-So my friend Allyson introduced me to my new friends Amy and Brittany. I stinking love them and you can see them throughout my pics down here. After we went to Disneyland, Brittany and I went to the Josh Gracin concert with our other friend Emily and we actuallly got to meet him! You can see in the pics where we were super close! We even got his autograph! It was so cool and he is a really nice person!
-Then, Allyson, Brittany, Amy and I went to Park City for a weekend...can't remember if there are pics up here of it, but we had a great night and went to the hot tub and just had some fun as a girls night!
-I MOVED!!! My roommate Katy got married and with this awesome news :) came the separation of my first apartment being away from home :( I lived there for exactly 1 and a half years and I absolutely loved it!!! But, with new things going on like that I had to move and now live in Orem. I live in a nice apartment that is close to work and my family and I love it!...even though I do miss my old roommate. BUT!!! My friends came over for a little housewarming dealeo and we decorated some cute little gingerbread houses. It was really fun!
-I spent Christmas and New Years with family and sadly got no pics :(
-January was an awesome month. This is when I just started to learn so much about myself!! I have learned so much about people in general but it was interesting to finally start learning about myself. I have been put in the paths of some amazing people and I started taking discussions with Missionaries in the LDS church and have learned quite a lot! I took some pics of them...they are so amazing! Elder Bitton is from California and he is just freaking the bomb! Elder Iopu is from Samoa and he was eating a Samoa girl scout cookie! haha we all thought it was funny...lol
-I've just been having fun with my family and it was my cute little nephew Maurice's birthday in March and also my little brother JuanDiego. They both are amazing and I love them so much. I sadly...again got no pics of my little brother on his birthday.
-I went to a Jazz game with my little brother Raul and it was great! The Jazz won so it was just a good night with my little bro!
-In March I got to go to 2 concerts that were pretty awesome! The first one I got to go to was Saving Abel. I had gone to see them a couple years ago when Nickleback came but I missed them performing because we got there a little late. But, with patience, they came back and I got to go to see them with my friend Justine. It was really fun and we got to see some other local bands that were pretty good too!
The other concert I got to go to was Lady Gaga. Holy!! This concert finally came after we bought our tickets like 8 months ago. My cousin Ruben is a HUGE...seriously HUGE fan of hers. So I went with him and my other cousin Lupita and it actually was one of the best concerts I have ever been to. Although I might not like her as much as my cousin does and I don't agree with some of her crazy antics...her talent really is undeniable. She has an amazing voice!
-Yes...that leperchaun is me. On St. Patrick's Day. It was genius and I loved it.
-April was a fun month as well! It was sad because Elder Iopu was transferred in March but then Elder Bitton was transferred as well in April. It was so sad to see him go! But that's what Facebook is for! Anyway, then Easter was so much fun! I got to color eggs with my family and then we had an awesome Easter egg hunt too! I just LOVE my family!
-May....oh May...this month has been soo good so far! I mean I know we are only like what 11 days into it but it really has treated me well. For the amazing Cinco de Mayo I had the best day ever!!! I had this awesome shirt that I bought in Mexico and I just wore it after 5 years of owning it! I got some sombreros and we made margaritas had chips and salsa with dip! It really was the best day ever!
-Today it was my BFF Hettie's bday! She is 23 and I love her so much! Her and I became friends when we were in the 5th grade! I started talking to her when we were doing our USA maps and I told her that I could sharpen my pencil with scissors...yes I know dorky..but it led to the best friendship ever! I love her so much and she was there for me when I was in my ugliest, most dorkiest, weirdest stage ever and I she will always have a spot in my heart! My other awesome friend from 3rd grade is in our pic too...Hettie is the one with cool big hair and Shianne is my other friend who is wearing glasses. Happy Birthday to you mi amiga!! :)
Well...If I missed captions on any of my pics and you have questions let me know...this is superlong and I am so sorry I have bored you!
But I will be going to Mexico in June and I will be updating then so I don't get behind. I hope that those of you who do read my blog have fun checking it out! Thanks :)
Hettie :)
Shianne, Hettie, Me
Me and Hettie
Cute girl!
The best margaritas ever! :)
Dr. Johnson on Cinco de Mayo
The tough Mexican that I am...
...I feel like I look like a chola.
My cousin Mariel and me on Easter
My family after the Easter Egg hunt
Elder Iopu ---^
Elder Bitton and Me
My cousin Sindi and I coloring eggs
My cousin Matt coloring eggs too..and Jaimie in the background!
Me and my cute...nephew I think?..big family lol Cute little Jordan!
Jessica and I at girls night for work...we are just tight like spandex! :)
The Easter eggs...I made one that said I <3 Jesus lol
Lady Gaga wannabes and my cousins
Ruben, me, Lupita
Lady Gaga!
St. Patty's Day!
The Jazz Game
Elder Iopu, Elder Bitton and the girls!
Some flowers my friends got me..they are amazing!
They were gorgeous when they opened up!
Me and Justine rockin out at Saving Abel!
My cute nephew Maurice that I just love with all my heart!
He is soo big!! He is 9 already!
The kids that I live with..my roommate has 2 cute little babies! Lexi and Landon!
Me holding my friend Amy's cute little newborn Keagen!
Me with my grill on...thas right..you ain't messin wit me!
Josh Gracin!!!...well that's a random man but we were at his concert!
Halloween!!
Some pics my cousin Ruben did for me for fun..he was practicing!
My friends went to India for a humanitarian project and this was a fundraiser they did!
My friend Brittany's birthday at the rodeo!
My daddy's birthday!
So many candles!!!
My little bros and my dad with me!
He really wanted a coffemaker lol
gingerbread house decorating!!
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